Thread:DivergenceKills/@comment-25673102-20150111232105/@comment-26243175-20150111234113

Entanglements wrote: Picture this: Entanglements enters Activerios' Bachelor Pad, where Activerios is found reclining on his polar bear rug in front of the fireplace, wine glass in hand.

(Activerios notices that there is a High School Marching Band positioned immediately behind Entanglements.)

Entanglements: "Greeting, Activerios, rising star of our beloved Wiki!"

Activerios (sipping his wine and checking his phone to watch his edit badges pile up): "Greetings Entanglements, who makes us all look good on the battlefield."

Entanglements presents Activerios with a small gift box, complete with Activerios Secret Initials engraved on the surface. "This is for you."

Activerios: "?" (a puzzled look on his face, as he pulls out a fine Havana cigar, ready to light up)

Entanglements: "Indeed, I just came from Headquarters, where I met..... Rinzler_9! (Thunder booms, the lights flicker, and lightning flashes before the windows)

Activerios: Not... THE Rinzler_9?!....

Entanglements: (lifting the visor on his AE helmet) "Indeed. The One."

Activerios: "What have you to report?"

Entanglements: "Well, in this box is a medal of dedication, to you."

(Activerios opens the gift box. Inside is a medal, to be worn about the neck. Inscribed are the words The Shot heard round The World.

Entanglements: "I met Rinzler_9 while playing Team Vs. in Headquarters. Everyone was Level 50. Everyone was on their game. But this match, I found myself pitted against....Him."

(Activerios shudders)

Entanglements: "I was equipped with my trusty Flare, but so was He. The fighting was fierce! So much respawning on both sides. I equipped Spotter so that I could better predict the opponents moves. And when I ran up the double flight of stairs....there HE was! He had Flare. He had AE and CQ. He quickly took me out. And yet.... AND YET! After my second respawn I ran back up and....truly....Flared Rinzler_9! (more thunder and lightning, the garbage disposal goes off momentarily, Activerios' dog lets off some flatulence)

(Actvierios looks skeptical)

Entanglements: Indeed! Keep your skeptical look! I indeed took out He Who We Do Not Name not just once, but several times! (More lightning)

(Entanglements continues, despite the fact that Activerios' Mom is now baking delicious cookies in the background, and Entanglements loves cookies)

"Not only did I pop him a few, but he even had to switch to Thumper! And as if that was not a desperate enough move, the pressure from myself and my teammates finally brought him to switch to Cricket! Indeed, Cricket! Perhaps the pressure was a little too great for our common Nemesis" (At this point Activerios has put down his Hunter Rifle which he was pointing at Entanglements, believing him to be telling a lie."

Entanglements now presents the Medal to Activerios, signals the band standing behind him to play Hail to the Chief, and kneels on one knee, presenting a spent Flare shell casing to Activerios.

"I present not only the Medal of Dedication to you, representing the shot I dedicated to you that took out Rinzer_9, but also the Flare casing found next to him where he fell by my great shot, while he was armed with his desperate Cricket at the bottom of the staircase by the Red Barrel"

The band is playing, Activerios and Entanglements are shaking hands. The Photographers are snapping photos. Obama is landing outside on Air Force One, ready to give us all a bear hug.

Oh yeah, it's all good.

The End

Indeed friend, I thought of you when I took Him out a few times! It was a good match, though he had more kills by far. But it is the truth that he was playing with a bit more desperation as the match went on. Thought you may like to know!

Obama comes in, giving everyone bear hugs. "Let me be clear - Entanglements is the greatest one man this nation - or any - has ever seen!"


 * A cocktail waiter comes in and starts to disperse drinks*

Activerios: "Oh no! I couldn't take this! I didn't take down Rinzler, YOU did! Surely you deserve it!"


 * The dog I don't have comes in and rolls over in front of you, followed by my mother, who apoligzes for ever deleting my game and gives you unlimited cookies for life*

(By the way, this is the funniest thing I have ever heard. xD)